" Wayne & Wayne "
" At The Budget Inn "
" ...In a six dollar motel with the honey bun
And nineteen glorious days in the Jersey sun.... "
From: wayne&wayne@darlington.com
Subject: Waitin' on the Boss!!
Wayne and I were sittin' around the pool at our NYC condo when the cell phone rang.
We had assumed we were off until July 1st. But as any reporter knows, when the call
comes, you gotta be ready! It was from our boss, JukeBoxGrad. Being the taskmaster
she is, she ordered us back on duty, threatening us with the loss of our Section 744
tickets she had provided for the last MSG show. Not wanting to lose out on our satellite
view of the E Street Band, we assured her that we were at her disposal. She gave us the
address of a Budget Inn, over in the Meadowlands, where it was rumored that Bruce and
the band were holed up. Though we were plenty skeptical, under our breath of course,
we were willing to humor her and head on over there. Knowing all the time, that the Boss
has much more class........than to stay at a Budget Inn!
Arrivin' about two hours later, we checked out the surroundings...being well trained in the
art of surveillance...We spotted a huge black bus, parked in the weeds in the rear of the Inn.
Next to it was a candy apple red Mercedes....with "Clarence Rocks" as the license number.
Now....being as experienced as we are..we thought we might be on to something. We either
had the E Street Band....or some tour arranged by a news group! Wayne went into his "undercover"
mode and headed for the lobby. He told the deskman that he was from the Acme Music Company
and was here to deliver some guitar strings to a "Mr. Springsteen". He was immediately hustled
into the parking lot by 35 security men. Again relying on our experience, we came to the conclusion
that THIS WAS THE PLACE........or that it was a very well guarded newsgroup tour!
We confirmed our suspicion when Wayne successfully pulled off the "phone" trick. Calling the
front desk, he was connected to Bruce's room by sayin' he was the "setlist" man.....from MSG!!
He told Bruce he was doin' the "handwritten" setlist, and he needed some info. Bruce, obviously
annoyed, told Wayne, "I don't care what the setlist is....just make sure that "Rosie" isn't on it...
and make sure ya have......"Two Hearts"...and "Prove it All Night"!! At that point, he hung up the phone.
Now, there comes a point, in the life of every journalist, when the ethics of his profession, conflict
with other deeply held convictions. This was the case with Wayne, and may explain his error in
rushing to the laptop in the minivan..and posting the motel's location..on 47 different Springsteen
newsgroups. Needless to say, within an hour, the parking lot was crawlin' with Crazy Janies,
Wendy's, Cozmic Kids and assorted tramps of every persuasion. The men became engrossed in
a game of "Backyard Bombadier", while the women just sat around on the hoods of the cars, drinkin'
warm beer......and talkin' about how they wished somebody would photograph them on a balcony, with Bruce,
in Barcelona..
Though we would have loved to join the revelry....we knew we had a job to do. We had to find the Boss...
and get an interview!! Wayne got tossed again, when he told them he was Patti's dietician...and I got evicted
when I told them I was the "spit valve" cleaner....for Clarence's sax! We decided that a direct, more honest approach
would be the ethical thing to do. We marched right up to the desk, and told them we were from "Candysroom",
on the Web.....and that we wanted to talk to Bruce. They immediately jumped up and escorted us into another
area of the lobby. There was much commotion, running hither and yon, whispered phone calls, conferences in corners,
and finally, four very large security men,
well dressed and important looking, told us they were there to escort us. They led us to an area in the rear of the motel,
and led us onto a freight elevator. There they thrashed us to within an inch of our life, and tossed us back into the parking lot.
As I was losing consciousness, I listened to the outrage in the crowd..."Hay man, did you see that? His body hit
the ground with such a beautiful thud!"....."Those poor cats are sure messed up"...." I wonder what they're getting
into?"
Admitting defeat, we gathered our wits for another day. We jumped in the van, stopping at the local emergency
room for some first aid, knowing all the time, that our aerial tickets were on the line. How were we going to
explain this to our boss? Does this mean no Pulitzer?? How were we goin' to face the Press Corps at Finnegan's
Wake??? We headed East, back into the city....determined that we would talk to Bruce....at the last concert ....
on Saturday night!!
Until then!!
ROCK ON!!!
Wayne&Wayne
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